Bedbugs, Brain Collapse, & Birthdays

Long time, no type.

Mainly, I’ve been riding the wave of gleeful post-homework life and spending very little computer time doing anything that requires significant cognitive processing. Not to mention that the last few weeks at work have been tremendously busy, and insanely stressful what with top-down administrative reorganizations, severe budget cuts, and the like. So needless to say, I haven’t been in much of a bloggy frame of mind.

However, I feel the need to issue a report on our grand vacation in early June; a whirlwind trip that started with my #1 niece’s high school graduation and ended with a crazy 5-day stint in…..you guessed it…..Las Vegas. The Vegas leg of the trip was a long-awaited family celebratory extravaganza to ring in a host of decade-centric birthdays (ahem, yes, I wasn’t the only one with a milestone this year.) One of my nephews, my brother, and my dear hubby all hit “decade” birthdays between mid April and mid June. So naturally we all felt the need to hoop it up in sin city.

But before I get ahead of myself too far, let me reel back a bit and describe the first segment of the trip. My dear eldest niece, so lovely in body and spirit, was graduating with honors from a tremendously rigorous International Baccalaureate-affiliated school the first weekend of June. I was very excited to attend, particularly to hear her speak at the graduation ceremony. However, seeing as said ceremony was scheduled to begin quite early in the morning, at roughly a 2-hour drive from our house, we opted to drive up the Friday before and meet up with GMom to share a hotel room.

Considering that we also had to plan ahead/pack for the Vegas trip, get the pets settled, load the car, feed the kid, and a million other things after an already-long day of work, we didn’t get out of town until almost 8pm, which put our arrival into a rather late-ish timeframe. After unloading our overnight gear and securing a late night snack courtesy of the only open business in the area — Circle K — I started prepping the little genius for bed. I left her in the hotel bathroom to marinate in the shower for a few moments while I went to unpack her jammies and get the bed ready. Upon reaching for a pillow, what did I see but a tiny little bug on the pillow!

Now, not that I travel all that much, but you’d have to live in a deep cave anymore these days not to be aware of ye olde modern hotel bedbug epidemic. Being a bonafide bug-o-phobe already, of course my mind leapt to the possibility of bedbugs, although the little specimen was very tiny. I asked FF and Uncle Bubba (also sharing the room) to give it an eyeball, and in the course of examining that and other pillows, they located a much larger and more suspicious looking critter, which we caught in a plastic cup. At that point, with frantic smartphone image Googling underway, we felt rather alarmed and certain that we hit the unlucky jackpot of a bedbug-infested room.

And honestly, the front desk wasn’t all that much help…they offered to move us to a different room, but that wasn’t very reassuring considering that all of us had horrific images of bringing home our very own bedbug buddies to our respective domiciles, never to be pest-free again. This was particularly unsettling to FF and I, considering that a few years ago we suffered through an epic, almost yearlong flea war at our old crappy apartment. And believe me, we tried everything, to no avail. Moving out WAS the final solution.  So needless to say, we are pretty particularly picky when it comes to bug issues.

So our troops did a quick huddle and we decided to relocate to another hotel (by this time nearly 1am), yet unfortunately the only affordable place reasonably nearby was a 30 minute drive away. Ugh. However, despite our collective exhaustion, this seemed a better option than potentially offering ourselves up as blood donors to the native fauna. The little genius was taking everything in stride pretty well, despite some confusion and tiredness. We repacked our overnight gear and shuffled back down to the van.  Unfortunately however, during the baggage and kid-loading insanity, we managed to lock a) the kid b) all our stuff and c) the keys, snugly in the van.

Oh shit.

So yes, friends and neighbors, we stood outside a bedbug-ridden hotel in a sleepy small hamlet at 1am shouting instructions through a closed window to our frantically crying daughter on how to escape her snug, safe, 5-point carseat harness with the child-resistant latch so that she could unlock the van for us. Totally not one of my proudest moments. Fortunately the little genius is a trooper and she calmed down and persevered enough to get us out of the fiasco. After that, we hit the highway and about an hour later we all collapsed into an exhausted slumber.

So the management did call and talk to Gmom the next day (she had made the reservation) and were properly apologetic and all that crap, issuing refunds and free night coupons ad nauseam. And a few days after that, they emailed a copy of their pest company report, predictably denying any bedbug issues but admitting the presence of some “carpet beetles”. Well, I appreciate them sharing the report and all but I gotta say that I’m still not convinced and I don’t think they actually examined the critter we captured and showed to the front desk staff.

SO, needless to say the next morning came very early and as for my little family pod, we reluctantly decided to skip the main ceremony and let the little genius continue to get some much-needed rest. We did attend the post-ceremony graduation party and it was a lot of fun, particularly when my niece “unwrapped” a very exciting present: a car! K thought that was just about the coolest and most exciting thing she’d ever heard of, and I’m pretty sure she will not forget it, and thus expectantly hold it over her parents’ heads until her own high school graduation. Sigh.

So with that dramatic report out of the way, I’m happy to say that the Vegas phase of the trip was tons of fun and very smooth sailing with no buggy or incompetent parenting episodes. We bowled, we saw movies, we gambled, we swam, we played a lot of cards in the sumptuous top-floor suite that K2 & family occupied, and generally a great time was had by all. The young guys (uncle bubba, my #1 nephew and #2 nephew) camped out in the 2nd suite bedroom and turned it into an X-box blazin’, Dr. Pepper guzzling, stinky man cave. They loved it.

FOUR LAYERS!

The guys went to see Cirque’s new Elvis show one night, and the next night the girls went to see Menopause: The Musical. Which was, um, quite an experience and has given me a slightly worried perspective on my future hormonal event horizon. (Is it too early to already be experiencing the whole brain collapse thing? ’cause lately….) Seriously though, the show was quite a laugh and a lot of fun to see with Gmom and Aunt D (K2’s mom).

Speaking of Gmom, she brought some serious magic to the table and managed to somehow make an amazingly elaborate cake in a hotel mini-kitchen for us birthday folks! Totally awesome. (and delicious!)

All in all, a trip (and birthday) to remember!

The Reality of 30

Yeah, I know. I promised a lengthy reflection on the gory details about turning 30 and I swear that I actually started writing said treatise but haven’t had the time yet to properly finish lining up my thoughts. In the interim, please enjoy yet another recent true-life conversation, this one between my Mom and I, a couple weeks ago:

Conversational setting: comparing notes on the royal wedding.

Gmom: you know, I’ve watched those two boys grow up all these years throughout all the drama of their family and the loss of their mother, and when the news started pouring out about the wedding, I was surprised to realize how old Wills had gotten!

Me: Geez mom! he’s younger than I am!

Gmom: well dear, you ARE 30 now.

Me: thanks mom.

Emerging From the Cave

Well hello, WordPress…seems you’ve kept yourself busy with sprucing up your features and interface lately. Cool, and just in time for me to do that long-promised blog overhaul. Maybe next week.

See, I have barely emerged from the cave-like existence of graduate school and it is taking some time for me to regain lost mental footing. These days, I struggle with remembering to eat breakfast let alone tackle mentally-intensive tasks like writing or website design.

Stating that I’m “relieved to be done” merely scratches the surface of where I’m at in my post-graduate cogitations, however I do find myself grappling a bit with the change in identity…can’t slap that “grad student” label around willy-nilly anymore. Which honestly feels a little strange. And maybe more than a smidge terrifying, when I think about student loan repayment schedules and whatnot (trying not to hyperventilate here).

http://www.toothpastefordinner.com/123004/

But at the end of the day, it is a tremendous accomplishment and something that for a long time, I abstractly believed would never end. The forward momentum required to initiate this degree and stick out some of the tougher moments while simultaneously wading through full-time career work, the parental mysteries of toddlerhood and preschool, and periodic bouts of crippling insomnia and grief-related depression. Anyway, lest I begin to verge upon the sorry state of “wallowing”, the reality is that I am one of the lucky ones…I had a lot going for me such as work-related tuition reduction, a supportive immediate and extended family network, and fantabulous colleagues I could draw on for expertise and assistance.  Nor did I have to write a thesis, take advanced statistics, or wade through any disgusting math classes. So all in all, a smashing success, even if I am mentally toasted and emotionally wiped out.

Anyway, all the naval-gazing aside, last weekend we had a little family get together (with the generous help of Gmom and UB–many thanks!) at our house to celebrate graduation and also K’s first dance recital (another delightful future post in the barrel…stay tuned!). It had the positive side-effect of motivating us to clean the house to a semi-reasonable state and tackle some long-ignored projects (packing away 18 months worth of outgrown little-genius clothing, anyone?). The day was so lovely, filled with laughter, fun and a zillion kids running around like electrocuted cats [that is–noisily bouncing off the walls].  The weather was even “relatively” reasonable, at a mere 95° with a wispy periodic breeze. I’m more grateful than words can express for all the support and love.

So onward and upward…in the short term hopefully to some side-contracted instructional design work, or possibly some adjunct teaching; in the longer term hopefully a position upgrade with my current employer or barring that, a reasonably painless and successful job search.

Or there is always….

Mr. McGuire: I just want to say one word to you. Just one word.
Benjamin: Yes, sir.
Mr. McGuire: Are you listening?
Benjamin: Yes, I am.
Mr. McGuire: Plastics.

Dear Mom

Regarding Mothers Day:

As your insane, nearly-graduated, slacker daughter par excellence, you have sadly not received any timely spring flowers nor pastel, earnest greeting card tasked with conveying all those deep mother-daughter sentiments which usually get obstinately stuck somewhere just below my larynx. I’m sorry to say that easy sentimentality and expressiveness just aren’t on my list of strengths.

Nonetheless, I do not want the occasion to pass without recognition of some sort, because while I AM bad at expressing such notions at times, the thoughts and feelings carry on. Thus, in lieu of overpriced/overcrowded brunches, flowers which die too quickly, or greeting cards which inadequately convey complex emotions, I decided to take a different tack and write a public blog post to revel in the happy fact that you are my mother. Hopefully, this doesn’t end up too weird for either one of us.

The first framing of my thoughts starts with a simple but profound realization: I have always taken your presence in my life for granted. I began to understand this most acutely after becoming a mother myself, but as time goes by the fact stares me in the face with greater frequency. This is not necessarily about the things you do or have done, or even the unique person that you are, but basically a burgeoning awareness of the gentle, invisible cocooning that those of us lucky enough to have great moms carry with us at all times. As Meghan O’Rourke observes:

A mother, after all, is your entry into the world. She is the shell in which you divide and become a life. Waking up in a world without her is like waking up in a world without sky: unimaginable.

So I suppose this is the actual ideal order of things; for our children to have such magical and positive parental relationships that they are able to take them for granted. But especially as I mature as a parent, I want you to know that I do recognize and value your presence (and comforting cocooning when called for) in my life. So much of what I know and who I am today was shaped and impacted by you; always for the better.

I believe some of this is best observed in the ways in which we are different; in the ways that, even within our adult relationship, we totally mystify (and yes, sometimes admittedly annoy!) each other at times. Amazingly, this does not dominate or negate the broader picture of our relationship. What a rare thing, to have someone in your corner that respects and embraces your fundamental differences as much as your similarities!

I guess the only thing left is to try and convey how much your endless cheerleading, affirmations, positivism, listening, support, and amazing mom-ness has always meant to me, and always will. There really aren’t sufficient words to adequately describe this…whether stuck below my larynx or floating in cyberspace, so hopefully you are able to use your awesome motherly powers to just understand what I mean.

Happy Mother’s Day….I love you always!

I Love Easter!

Although, admittedly in a secular, chicks-and-bunnies-springy-kind-of-way. Growing up, it was always pretty much at the top of my favorite holiday list. No wonder that seeing the little genius enjoy it so thrills me to no end. Since I’m too burnt out to actually write any kind of narrative, I’ll use last Halloween’s crutch and provide a retrospective photographic sampling (click on any image to enlarge).  Enjoy!

Easter 2006

WhatCHU lookin' at? Haven't you ever seen a kid with pink satin ears?

Ok, enough with the props, Mom

Why yes, I believe I will gnaw on this basket now, thank you

Easter 2007

Cute as a bug, but slightly confused by the whole basket situation.

You may force me to wear this sun hat, but you will never take my yellow pretties! (CACKLE)

Easter 2008

I have no idea why we barely got any pictures in 2008...

Easter 2009

Cutest. Easter. Dress. EVER. (she got the worst sunburn of her young life that day, sigh.)

Easter 2010

Her patented "I Just Got Out of Bed" look

She had WAY too much fun painting eggs...

Awesome bunny balloon courtesy of GMOM...this thing was kicking around our house for MONTHS after Easter!

Easter 2011

Another "I Just Got Out of Bed" moment

She found a ladybug and it was hands-down the biggest rockstar of the day!

Just...hold....still!!!